It Don't Get REALer Than This...

Kim wasn't Tardy for The Party at her Waxers!

Gurrrrl- I know it is called HOTlanta but put some panties on!

(*btw- I had to SEARCH for a censored version of this pic. And you're welcome!

Her kitty ain't pretty if you get my drift!)

Sister?

All 8 of the babies were devils...

The Octomom is crazy clucked up!!

Say Hello To My Little Friend....

East 80th Street, NYC

(there are fans and then there are FANS!)

New York Lottery Sweet Million "Sleepy Time"

Such Cuteness for YOU!

Long Live Larry!!!

So, Larry The Lobster has been living in a tank at Oceana restaurant here in NYC and he clocks in at 11lbs (fat ass). Apparently, that makes him 70 years old!! (Some sort of "weight per year" math- thank God that ain't applied to humans)...

Now, his tank was simply a holding cell until someone ordered him BUT after a column about him by some Bloomberg restaurant dude started a Free Larry campaign, he is FREE!! FREE!! They are letting him loose in the ocean to swim, scuttle and perhaps, make baby lobsters!

Good for you Oceana managers! Good for you Bloomberg Dude! And good for you Larry! Watch out for nets and such!!

also- good for you lilaoshi04 who took the opportunity to post this comment on the

Larry The Lobster story Reader Comment board....

I am a Air Force and single at present .I need a women who can love me back ...

I also uploaded my hot photos on Uniformedmingle.coooom under the name of Military89757..

It's the largest and best club for seeking Army, Navy, Marines, Air Force, Police Force, and the admirers of those who wear the uniform.

I just hope you don't mind me being a soldier ...Please Check it out!I'm serious.

He's serious. So "serious" that this was the best platform he had to find love... looking for his lobster, perhaps?

Diamond Does Window!

This was my bedroom window. It wass 7000 years old (give or take). It didn't lock. It couldn't hold an AC. It was ugly. It needed to be replaced!

Enter my personal Superhero- Diamond Don!!

Concrete is no match for my Dad!

After being allowed to break one window pane (which was WAY fun),

I was just in the way so I did some raking!!

Meanwhile, the new window is looking great!!

Did Diamond Don work through the night?? NOPE! He just started again before the sun came up! Which, of course, is my favorite time to do chores...

I fixed a broken pane on the other window all by myself! I heart duct tape!

And in less than half a day... I present to you... A Diamond Don original....

My new WINDOW!!!

An Even Newer Newest Addition!

My Mom found this beautiful fella for me awhile back but he is pretty big and pretty heavy and thus had to be hand delivered! He's a crabby one-- cracked up the concrete and then scuttled off to his new spot ! I like him despite his shellfish-ness!

Thanks, Mom!!

My Newest Addition....

This is my newest Gnome... He was a birthday gift from my pal, Roy! He's Poopin!

(At Roy's birthday party, everyone wore moustaches... I wasn't at the party as it was in LA but I felted Roy a shirt in his honor to wear to brunch and to place The Pooper!)

For All You Lovers Out There...

As if the Snuggie isn't sexy enough on it's own...

this website has ideas for two!

This pose is called "The Night In".

Thank goodness the Snuggie has sleeves or

she couldn't enjoy her novel, too!

www.thesnuggiesutra.com

A Fine Birthday Project!

When I was in London with my Goddaughter and Sis- we went to the Natural History Museum. Yeah. Yeah. Dinosaurs. Skeletons. Dead Things. HOLD. THE. PHONE!!!!

Rhino Poo In A Box?!!

Apparently, with this tiny box of poo, I can grow a banana tree! And I quote- "gestation time is erratic" so, I wouldn't hold your breath for the banana bread but I have been waiting for the perfect time to plant this gem and my birthday seemed just right!

And there it is! My banana seed in its' poo bed- happy as a clam- being watched over by Little Miss Chatterbox. For the record... it didn't smell. I know, right! It's magic poo. And yes, they also had Reindeer Poo and Elephant Poo but I figured that there was only so many tiny boxes of poo one could get through customs and as we all know.... I love a rhino!

I'll keep you posted!

Really?

I think someone's feelings are hurt....

Happy Fall!

As I was looking for a parking spot with the Newly Redeemed Vehicle I oft drive, I spotted this display on 35th St. in Astoria! The people love to decorate for holidays in my town and sometimes- on a glorious fall day with the sun shining and the leaves fiery-

it just makes me smile!

(So, as you may have guessed- I stopped to take a pic of his smiling Jack and these two dudes saw me and inquired about my enjoyment of the scene remarking "that's what they do". Confused, I said- "You blow up giant pumpkins?" Turns out they were Patio Technicians.

Brick Layers. Whatever one is titled who builds these things! One of them had a Bills hat on. Clearly, if I was in need, they would be first on my list!)

Cupcakes, Karaoke & The Impound?!

CON ED READS MY BLOG?!?!

Well, Happy Birthday to Me!

What a delightful surprise...

Dear Con Ed-

I have forgiven you the blackout in the height of the summer heat that forced me to sleep with frozen veg whilst they were still frozen. 6 days without power later, I let you back into my house. A) I had no other choice- you are Astoria's power supplier and B) I did have the Waldorf to fall back on since my frozen veg only kept me cool for a couple o' hours without the freezer to re-freeze.

I have forgiven you for frying the wires in my building after a "power surge". I didn't need any of those appliances anyway. And firemen using their Predator-like, heat seeking devices to choose where to pound holes in the wall is always fun. And even with the fear of fire and the smell of smoke hanging in the air- I let you back in my house.

But for reals... Can you come pick up your shit?! Four weeks is long enough for me to look at it- though the clinging leaves and accumulated garbage is a real bonus.

love, jenn

i dOn"t LiKE iT eIthEr.

TweEt !

They Come on A STALK?!

Cereal Is A Cut Throat Business...

...and Kellogg's wants to claim their flakes!

Cuz a flake by any other name ain't Kellogg's!

You Want More!? You Want More!?

Well, I gots more for you!! I call this... Scenes From An Italian(German) Family

Cousins, Sister-in-Law and Cousins' Children... Oh, My!

My Fam. Visiting my Grandma's House

We made pretzels! Yep- pretzels! They were delish! And we aren't even Amish!

Kelli & I enjoyed the salting...

Athea meets her Great Grand Poppie! And falls in love...

Jeff and I misunderstood who the crafts were for!

Bills fans are born with a Buffalo wardrobe and a wing in their hand...

My glorious cousin, Val!

Eli was out like a light when I left for the airport. I went up to have a cuddle and I admit, I poked him a bit and tried to wake him. Poor lamb was TIRED and wasn't getting up. He did, however- pick his head up, look at me, say "Denn" sleepily, and take my hand. His sweetness makes my heart sing.... (and yes, I laid there and wept. I just love him.)