Whilst on the beautiful isle of St. Lucia, Kerry and I decided to partake in a stroll through the Rain forest. We had visions of beautiful foliage and strange, alien-like flowers, maybe a glimpse of a lizard or a parrot or even a snake or two... We brought sneakers. We thought we were prepared. Turns out... HELLS NO!!
We thought we were going on an easy hike, We had one small bottle of water between us and bug spray in our handbags (note I didn't say back packs). We had cameras and swimsuits (for a dip in the waterfall we were meant to encounter) and off we went! I made fun when they handed us walking sticks- alternating between playing majorette and embracing my inner Gandolf and using my staff to release Kerry from the evil grip of Saruman. Ahhh, the innocence. We were a little winded on the way into the Rain forest as down, down, down we went. But I was taking pictures and brandishing my staff and looking forward to the swim. We saw a lizard and great flowers, plants and trees and did not kill the other hikers (who were crazy annoying!) This is the joy that was the waterfall.... Do you feel the joy??
It was on the way UP that the lie became the truth. This particular hike (we later learned) was rated moderate to strenuous. MODERATE to STRENUOUS!!!! 45 minutes to an hour it took us to get out and it was straight uphill. Now, we did see a parrot fly away (most likely terrified by the echoes of our heavy breathing and the crash of my lungs collapsing) but we only saw it because we couldn't move another friggin' step. At one point, our guide shouted to Kerry & I that it was only "5 more minutes". I promptly responded (in my most delightful, lack of volume control growl) - "your 5 minutes or my 5 minutes!!!" Ahh, the peaceful sounds of the Rain forest... shattered. As Kerry so eloquently gasped it (who knew she should have brought her inhaler?)- "nature is overrated". In that moment, had I had the strength to nod, I would have wholeheartedly agreed.
It was on the way UP that the lie became the truth. This particular hike (we later learned) was rated moderate to strenuous. MODERATE to STRENUOUS!!!! 45 minutes to an hour it took us to get out and it was straight uphill. Now, we did see a parrot fly away (most likely terrified by the echoes of our heavy breathing and the crash of my lungs collapsing) but we only saw it because we couldn't move another friggin' step. At one point, our guide shouted to Kerry & I that it was only "5 more minutes". I promptly responded (in my most delightful, lack of volume control growl) - "your 5 minutes or my 5 minutes!!!" Ahh, the peaceful sounds of the Rain forest... shattered. As Kerry so eloquently gasped it (who knew she should have brought her inhaler?)- "nature is overrated". In that moment, had I had the strength to nod, I would have wholeheartedly agreed. And so- that is two important lessons we take away from St. Lucia.... never attempt to apply aerosol sunscreen on a windy beach and never, NEVER attempt a hike whose rating is unknown!!
Thank you and good night.
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